I recently read this article about new legislation being proposed in Arizona. It would allow "business owners with strongly held religious beliefs to refuse service to gays." I am trying to wrap my head around what the proponents of this bill are trying to achieve.
Refusing to do business with someone simply because he/she is gay is discriminatory. That would be like refusing to do business with me because I have red hair. And how do you weed out whom to do business with? Does everyone have to take an oath before walking through your door, or do you have a special gay detector? Instead of the outdated, "smoking or non-smoking," will we now be greeted with, "hetero or non-hetero"? The number of businesses where ones sexual preference has any bearing on the transaction are probably very limited.
Why not do business with gays? Is it because they are sinners? I have a newsflash for you. We are all sinners! I guarantee that Jesus never turned away sinners, so claiming the Christianity defense doesn't exactly hold water. Refusing to sell a taco to someone because you don't like his brand of sin is discrimination, plain and simple. I doubt that not repairing someone's car will make him or her decide that being gay isn't worth the trouble. Maybe the proponents are hoping all the gay people will leave Arizona. Great. You've cleansed your state of all the "undesirables" and life is hunky dory!
Now, about the adulterers, liars, gossips, porn addicts, blasphemers, gluttons, and...and...and. Your "strongly held religious beliefs" include a dim view of these sins, too. This reeks of hypocrisy.
I know this doesn't sound like the typical stance most people would expect from me. At least, not those who think they know me and all Christians. Don't worry. I will not disappoint. I just chose to make the other side of my argument in another blog. Look for the flip side in Complicity of Sin.
Monday, February 24, 2014
Tuesday, February 18, 2014
How gratifying is instant gratification?
Meet Charlie. He is 8 years old and has a non-operable brain tumor which has not responded to radiation or chemotherapy. Charlie is going to die next Monday.
He is not old enough to die for his country, vote, or sign a legally binding agreement, yet the choice of when he will die has been given to him.
Ridiculous, right? Not in Belgium.
Charlie is not an actual person. I made him up, but that doesn't mean there aren't children like him. The Belgian Parliament has voted in favor of euthanasia without age limits. Congratulations, Belgium! You should be proud of your progressive ideas. BLECH!
I was reading this to my husband, and David (11) was listening in. He asked where the children go after they die. I said that children go to heaven because all the children belong to God. David said, "Oh, because they're not old enough to choose for themselves."
Brilliant!
If a child has not reached the age of consent and isn't old enough to make a decision for Christ-with a full understanding of what that means-how can he or she choose to die?
I do not mean to belittle their pain. It is not fair for a child to suffer constantly or to have to live in a drug-induced haze. Still, I think I would do anything to fight for the lives of my children. I understand depression can also be physically painful, yet suicide is illegal. I know adults who live in constant pain, either from injuries or illness, who would probably prefer to die at times, but they learn to deal with/manage/suffer through it because death is so permanent.
But if they are going to die anyway, why not relieve them of their suffering?
We are all going to die anyway. Does this mean we should just give up at the first sign of difficulty or pain? Or even the second or the hundredth? One thing children have trouble grasping is "tomorrow". They want what they want, and they want it NOW! They can't see past the moment they are in. It is up to the adults to guide them to this understanding, with patience and love.
When my autistic son requests something that he must wait for, I try to teach him how to wait. I give him a timeline of what must happen first. Sometimes he doesn't get what he wants at school because he didn't do his work. He may cry, or even throw a fit. His teacher doesn't give in to him. She explains that he has another day to "try again tomorrow."
I know I am not talking about life and death decisions here. But try reasoning with an autistic child who has difficulty communicating his wants and needs. This is no easy task. It must be a billion times more difficult for parents watching their child suffer in pain. I'd like to believe that I would work to instill hope in my children instead of giving them the option to end it all.
Toaster waffles
Microwave popcorn
Movies on demand
Instant pain relief
Death by request
We've come a long way, but to what end?
He is not old enough to die for his country, vote, or sign a legally binding agreement, yet the choice of when he will die has been given to him.
Ridiculous, right? Not in Belgium.
Charlie is not an actual person. I made him up, but that doesn't mean there aren't children like him. The Belgian Parliament has voted in favor of euthanasia without age limits. Congratulations, Belgium! You should be proud of your progressive ideas. BLECH!
I was reading this to my husband, and David (11) was listening in. He asked where the children go after they die. I said that children go to heaven because all the children belong to God. David said, "Oh, because they're not old enough to choose for themselves."
Brilliant!
If a child has not reached the age of consent and isn't old enough to make a decision for Christ-with a full understanding of what that means-how can he or she choose to die?
I do not mean to belittle their pain. It is not fair for a child to suffer constantly or to have to live in a drug-induced haze. Still, I think I would do anything to fight for the lives of my children. I understand depression can also be physically painful, yet suicide is illegal. I know adults who live in constant pain, either from injuries or illness, who would probably prefer to die at times, but they learn to deal with/manage/suffer through it because death is so permanent.
But if they are going to die anyway, why not relieve them of their suffering?
We are all going to die anyway. Does this mean we should just give up at the first sign of difficulty or pain? Or even the second or the hundredth? One thing children have trouble grasping is "tomorrow". They want what they want, and they want it NOW! They can't see past the moment they are in. It is up to the adults to guide them to this understanding, with patience and love.
When my autistic son requests something that he must wait for, I try to teach him how to wait. I give him a timeline of what must happen first. Sometimes he doesn't get what he wants at school because he didn't do his work. He may cry, or even throw a fit. His teacher doesn't give in to him. She explains that he has another day to "try again tomorrow."
I know I am not talking about life and death decisions here. But try reasoning with an autistic child who has difficulty communicating his wants and needs. This is no easy task. It must be a billion times more difficult for parents watching their child suffer in pain. I'd like to believe that I would work to instill hope in my children instead of giving them the option to end it all.
Toaster waffles
Microwave popcorn
Movies on demand
Instant pain relief
Death by request
We've come a long way, but to what end?
Thursday, February 13, 2014
No. Life Is Not Fair.
This is a true story about young woman I know. I'll call her Jane. She has a couple of children. One whom she gave up custody of, and a younger one I'll call Joe. Jane and Joe were homeless. They had friends who helped house them until they could get into a shelter. Jane was dating a man I'll call Josh. Josh was in a similar living situation as Jane and he suffered with mental health issues. Jane said she was in love with Josh and wanted to have a baby with him. Her friends tried to discourage this but to no avail. Recently, Jane gave birth to a healthy baby girl. I pray for their well-being.
This morning I woke up to read a Facebook update telling of a couple who just said good-bye to their 25 day old son. He was born at 24 weeks gestation, just 3 weeks after his twin sister had died from her premature birth. These are not the first two children they have lost. I know how painful the repeated loss of babies/infants can be and my heart aches for this couple.
When Caleb died, Mary became very ill. Despite her involvement in a children's grief support group, she did not know how to work through her feelings of grief and she contracted pneumonia. The following year when my mom died, Mary started having other physical manifestations of her grief. We took her to the doctor who told us there was nothing physically wrong with her. He suggested we help her find an outlet for her feelings. We encouraged her to express herself through her creativity-poetry, music, art. This seemed to help some but now her symptoms are back in full force. I took her aside and told her that she would be better if she would express her feelings. Then she told me that she goes out into the backyard and thinks about the people she loves and it reminds her of things that make her sad. Then she literally broke down in my arms. She cried harder than I have ever seen any of my children cry. We cried together. This pain goes deeper than anything physical. There is no cast or surgery to fix what is wrong. Mary will have to allow herself to experience the pain and fear she is fighting to hold back. She has agreed to talk to a counselor to see if that will help, so we have a plan to help her move forward and not stay stuck in her grief.
Life is unfair. No parent should have to bury a child. No child should have to deal with so much grief. I find comfort in God's promises, otherwise I would spend my days cursing the wind. Without the hope I have in the resurrection of Christ, I would find no reason to carry on in the face of so much pain and heartache. I do not believe that God makes bad things happen. I know that He wants us to call on Him when they do. He always answers.
This morning I woke up to read a Facebook update telling of a couple who just said good-bye to their 25 day old son. He was born at 24 weeks gestation, just 3 weeks after his twin sister had died from her premature birth. These are not the first two children they have lost. I know how painful the repeated loss of babies/infants can be and my heart aches for this couple.
When Caleb died, Mary became very ill. Despite her involvement in a children's grief support group, she did not know how to work through her feelings of grief and she contracted pneumonia. The following year when my mom died, Mary started having other physical manifestations of her grief. We took her to the doctor who told us there was nothing physically wrong with her. He suggested we help her find an outlet for her feelings. We encouraged her to express herself through her creativity-poetry, music, art. This seemed to help some but now her symptoms are back in full force. I took her aside and told her that she would be better if she would express her feelings. Then she told me that she goes out into the backyard and thinks about the people she loves and it reminds her of things that make her sad. Then she literally broke down in my arms. She cried harder than I have ever seen any of my children cry. We cried together. This pain goes deeper than anything physical. There is no cast or surgery to fix what is wrong. Mary will have to allow herself to experience the pain and fear she is fighting to hold back. She has agreed to talk to a counselor to see if that will help, so we have a plan to help her move forward and not stay stuck in her grief.
Life is unfair. No parent should have to bury a child. No child should have to deal with so much grief. I find comfort in God's promises, otherwise I would spend my days cursing the wind. Without the hope I have in the resurrection of Christ, I would find no reason to carry on in the face of so much pain and heartache. I do not believe that God makes bad things happen. I know that He wants us to call on Him when they do. He always answers.
Wednesday, February 12, 2014
Let Me Tell You What I Despise About Valentine's Day
Who is really celebrating the life of Saint Valentine on SAINT Valentine's Day? Even in my 10 years of Catholic schooling, I do not recall learning anything about Saint Valentine. I DO remember a really cool craft that Kristie Allen's mom came to teach all of us, and I looked it up online and duplicated it for Nathan's preschool class. I also remember being told that we didn't have to bring a valentine for everyone. Did some of us feel excluded? Yes. Were we forever scarred? Let's just say you don't easily forget only receiving 5 valentines in a class of 25 students.
Pity party over. Don't forget your goody bag.
Instead of focusing on what I don't know about Saint Valentine, I will get to the heart of my problem with this "holiday" besides the fact that it's not really a holiday when you have to go to school/work.
The big push on Valentine's Day is romantic love. What is this romance? Here is how Merriam-Webster defines romance:
1 a (1) : a medieval tale based on legend, chivalric love and adventure, or the supernatural (2) : a prose narrative treating imaginary characters involved in events remote in time or place and usually heroic, adventurous, or mysterious (3) : a love story especially in the form of a novel
2 : something (as an extravagant story or account) that lacks basis in fact
3 : an emotional attraction or aura belonging to an especially heroic era, adventure, or activity
Legend. Imaginary characters. Lacks basis in fact. An emotional attraction. I'm noticing a trend here. Romantic love is a nice idea but when we measure reality against fantasy.... Well, we've all seen the video of the photo shopped model. Romantic love is to healthy, mature relationships what photo shop is to the self-esteem of young girls.
Legend. Imaginary characters. Lacks basis in fact. An emotional attraction. I'm noticing a trend here. Romantic love is a nice idea but when we measure reality against fantasy.... Well, we've all seen the video of the photo shopped model. Romantic love is to healthy, mature relationships what photo shop is to the self-esteem of young girls.
Besides being unrealistic, romantic love is far from the most important kind of love. Valentine's Day, as it is celebrated today, steers clear of three very important (and all-encompassing) types of love: philia-love for your fellow man, storge-love for your family, and agape-sacrificial love. Instead, the main focus is on eros-physical, sensual love.
There is no greater love than to lay down one's life for one's friends.
Honor your father and your mother.
Love your neighbor as yourself.
Love your enemies.
The idea is not to "romance" your neighbors or enemies. If I do not send flowers to my friends, they don't question my feelings for them. My family doesn't need me to buy them gifts to be assured of my love for them. I like to keep it simple. I TELL them that I love them. I am available to them. I do things to brighten their days. I pray for them. I treat them how I want to be treated. I would die for my loved ones.
Valentine's Day is like the restricted country club of holidays. If you don't have eros love in your life, then just keep moving. There's nothing for you here. This leaves many people feeling alone and depressed and, possibly, seeking a false sense of physical love. They forget all of the other kinds of love they have in their lives, and these are no less important. In fact, without storge, agape, and philia, we may never find meaningful eros. Only lust, and that has NOTHING to do with love.
Valentine's Day is like the restricted country club of holidays. If you don't have eros love in your life, then just keep moving. There's nothing for you here. This leaves many people feeling alone and depressed and, possibly, seeking a false sense of physical love. They forget all of the other kinds of love they have in their lives, and these are no less important. In fact, without storge, agape, and philia, we may never find meaningful eros. Only lust, and that has NOTHING to do with love.
We should tell the people in our lives that we love them. Do a random act of kindness for a stranger to show him he is loved. Love yourselves. If you won't, why would anyone else? After all, Christ thought you were "to die for."
Love is a decision we make every day. To love or not to love. The choice is yours. Real love is not based on emotions or a date on the calendar. We don't need a made up holiday to remind us that we have love.
P.S. If you are married or seriously dating, please do not let your happiness or the well being of your relationship hinge on what your partner does or doesn't do for you on Valentine's Day. If you do, then it might be time to re-examine your priorities.
P.S. If you are married or seriously dating, please do not let your happiness or the well being of your relationship hinge on what your partner does or doesn't do for you on Valentine's Day. If you do, then it might be time to re-examine your priorities.
Sunday, February 9, 2014
How Do I Love Thee?
Winter.
I love this time of year. The crispness of fall has turned into the chill of winter. The colors of autumn have given way to bare branches. Like watching a baby sleep, it is calming to see the earth in this state of rest.
Snow.
I love the way it makes the world look like a fresh, clean slate, blanketed in silence. Watching the seemingly weightless flakes fall gently to the ground, or being swept up by the wind, swirling like a magical flourish. It gives me a feeling of peace and serenity.
Oregon.
God has blessed us with this beautiful country. So much of Oregon is untouched by man's development. We get to enjoy the coast, rivers, waterfalls, and mountains. The fresh food brought forth from the land. I love this place we get to call home.
I love this time of year. The crispness of fall has turned into the chill of winter. The colors of autumn have given way to bare branches. Like watching a baby sleep, it is calming to see the earth in this state of rest.
Snow.
I love the way it makes the world look like a fresh, clean slate, blanketed in silence. Watching the seemingly weightless flakes fall gently to the ground, or being swept up by the wind, swirling like a magical flourish. It gives me a feeling of peace and serenity.
Oregon.
God has blessed us with this beautiful country. So much of Oregon is untouched by man's development. We get to enjoy the coast, rivers, waterfalls, and mountains. The fresh food brought forth from the land. I love this place we get to call home.
Sunday, January 26, 2014
Lookie what I found!
It's my blog. We've been absent from one another for so long that I almost completely forgot where it was.
Since we were last together a LOT has happened. Matt began that new job and is now the IT manager at the same company. I picked up a new full-time childcare client in the fall of 2012 and we are still going strong. I have been baking cakes for donations to cancer research and to help people with cancer-related bills. I joined a weight loss/fitness challenge and lost over 40 pounds, maintaining about 30 pounds of that loss. I haven't been doing my comedy but am still writing jokes for when I feel like getting back on stage. I have also taken up running and have three races lined up for this year, so far.
It's been a busy three years and I look forward to getting back to blogging more often.
And it might be time to update my header photo.
Since we were last together a LOT has happened. Matt began that new job and is now the IT manager at the same company. I picked up a new full-time childcare client in the fall of 2012 and we are still going strong. I have been baking cakes for donations to cancer research and to help people with cancer-related bills. I joined a weight loss/fitness challenge and lost over 40 pounds, maintaining about 30 pounds of that loss. I haven't been doing my comedy but am still writing jokes for when I feel like getting back on stage. I have also taken up running and have three races lined up for this year, so far.
It's been a busy three years and I look forward to getting back to blogging more often.
And it might be time to update my header photo.
Monday, July 11, 2011
He is at work.....
God, that is. And soon, so will Matt be. That's right, folks. A mere 11 months after Matt was let go from his job at Hampton Lumber he will be employed as the IT guy for a small airplane parts manufacturer. He will receive an hourly wage which means they will be more inclined to stick to a 40 hour work week. If they don't, the time-and-a-half will be greatly appreciated. In addition to this job coming as we are getting to the bottom of the savings barrel, it is only 4.4 miles from home. Bicycle, bus, feet, or sled (when it snows) Matt will not have to worry about the commute.
God has had quite a big job taking care of us and He has had a lot of help from the people in our community. We recognize all of our family and friends as His hands at work in our lives. Thank you, Father, for helping us to look at life from a new perspective. We are more grateful for opportunities to help others. I am thankful for the patience I have learned over this past year.
I am most thankful that I have had a year of having my husband around me constantly (minus his 2 weeks in California) and I do not want him to go back to work. I have loved having him here and will miss him for the 9 hours a day he will be gone. What a precious gift to really miss your spouse!
We are frantically trying to do what we can together for this last week. Today is a picnic, tomorrow is a trip to the zoo and, if the weather improves, we'll play at the splash pad.
Thank you for your prayers and support. We'll always take those. If we can do anything for you don't hesitate to ask. God's blessings have been abundant and we love to share the wealth!
God has had quite a big job taking care of us and He has had a lot of help from the people in our community. We recognize all of our family and friends as His hands at work in our lives. Thank you, Father, for helping us to look at life from a new perspective. We are more grateful for opportunities to help others. I am thankful for the patience I have learned over this past year.
I am most thankful that I have had a year of having my husband around me constantly (minus his 2 weeks in California) and I do not want him to go back to work. I have loved having him here and will miss him for the 9 hours a day he will be gone. What a precious gift to really miss your spouse!
We are frantically trying to do what we can together for this last week. Today is a picnic, tomorrow is a trip to the zoo and, if the weather improves, we'll play at the splash pad.
Thank you for your prayers and support. We'll always take those. If we can do anything for you don't hesitate to ask. God's blessings have been abundant and we love to share the wealth!
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